Coming to Terms

Okay.  I just got some really big, like life-changing news.  It’s not cancer, I’ve not been given a timeline of my death.  But the doctor said there will be lifestyle changes.  This is real.  This was about a week and a half ago.  I know I’m going to experience a lot of emotions (I already have) and there’s a whole lot I don’t know, like how quickly this will affect me.  But I do know I have to accept the reality of the situation.  I can be hopeful, wishful, positive, optimistic.  I can pray about it.  But I’m not going to pray that it will go away.  I will pray that I will find the strength I need to face this obstacle and use it as a force of change.  Learn the lessons it has to offer.

Rebuking it is a kind of denial I don’t want to waste my time on.  Denying the reality of the situation would only slow me down.  What happens if you keep praying, rebuking, denying it and it doesn’t go away?  Is it your fault?  Were you not faithful enough?  Were you not praying hard enough?  Waste. of. time.  The focus is on the wrong thing.  Accept it and get to the business of figuring out what this will mean to you.  How will I define this?  How am I going to react?  That’s all I can control, my thoughts and actions.

This is just an experience to purify, to distill.  Am I living a life of no regrets?

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